Sunday, August 07, 2005

Bravery With a Broom

For a few months now, the fridge has been acting as though it's lost its will to live. One noticeable symptom has been the daily discovery of water in the egg holder tray on the door. This water was once frozen in the freezer but decided to melt and move to the fridge and call the cozy little egg holding cups home. It would refreeze onto a towel set over the tray to absorb the water so there's been a lot of morphing going on and I can only imagine what this could be doing to the monthly electric bill. It was time to diagnose the problem and lay upon this dying fridge some hands of healing.

The first task was to remove the not-used-daily-or-even-yearly items that inhabit the roof of the fridge. Once the countless cookbooks and hurricane lamps were transferred to a kitchen counter, it was time to slide the fridge out of its nook and into the center of the room for further diagnosis. It was then that the made-for-movies scream could be heard. The fridge didn't fall over or anything like that, but the discovery behind the fridge sent chills up my spine and reminded me, once again, that I'm really not a domestic goddess--not by a stretch of anyone's imagination.

Lurking behind the fridge (that came with this late 1970's fixer-upper) was an undiscovered nation. Beating tribal drums were heard along with the frightening shrills of the dust bunny banshees. There were mountains and deep valleys and items held as captives. Ink pens, too many to count, had been lost to these tribes. Two once-red can coozies were enveloped in multitudinous mounds of rabid dust bunnies. They were hardly recognizable... nearly completely gray like the bunnies that besieged them. It was a horrifying scene and one that'd I'd not been prepared for.

Quickly, I searched for a broom. I thought for sure that I owned one, I think I've even used it in the past... where WAS that damn thing?? I knew a broom would be a suitable weapon against the band of bunnies... that or a wet-vac but that'd take too much energy to round up from the garage. I'm looking for swift justice here, there's no time to dawdle.

With broom securely in hand, the ghastly task of sweeping up the colony was completed in a short amount of time. Who knew such a domestic duty could be completed so quickly?? Obviously, not me, or it'd been done long before this country-in-the-dark could have grown to such a monumental size.

Once the fridge and its surroundings were rid of dust and doom, it was returned to the site of the massacre. The cookbooks and lamps were placed back in their rightful locations-- but without the dust from before. As the screams of the bevy of bunnies faded, I paused to pay respects to the coozies. They were collected from Cheers in Boston. I had to take a very long pause to remember when they were purchased because they obviously hadn't been missed for all this time. Ahh yes, it was 1992. RIP coozies and good riddance you rodents of the darkness.


Anonymous Dave2 said...

Alas poor dustbunnies, we knew thee well.

For me, the only thing worse than cleaning under/behind the refrigerator, is cleaning INSIDE the refrigerator. I get scared just thinking about it.

August 07, 2005 11:17 AM  
Blogger Floridacracker said...

Everytime we move our fridge for something, I am shocked by the ick beneath and behind it.Brave girl.

August 08, 2005 4:07 PM  
Blogger Kristi said...

My freezer melts off to the back of my fridge where it collects in one of my handy Tupperware containers (yeah, getting my money's worth there). There, it becomes a block of ice, emptied probably monthly. I moved the fridge jsut a year and a half ago...not ready to go there again quite yet.

August 09, 2005 4:40 PM  
Blogger HeartSleeve said...

Inquiring minds must ask...
did this wholesale eviction of bunnies return your trusty appliance to its proper state, or, like Poor Yorick of Hamlet fame, did it expire from the effort?

August 11, 2005 10:56 AM  

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